100 To Theo van Gogh. Etten, Sunday, 31 December 1876.

metadata

No. 100 (Brieven 1990 100, Complete Letters 83)
From: Vincent van Gogh
To: Theo van Gogh
Date: Etten, Sunday, 31 December 1876

Source status

Original manuscript

Location

Amsterdam, Van Gogh Museum, inv. no. b100 V/1962

Date

Letter headed: ‘Etten 31 December 1876’.

Additional

This letter was probably enclosed in a letter written by Mr and Mrs van Gogh to Theo, since they say in their letter that Vincent will have written about his Dordrecht plans (FR b2804).

original text

1r:1

Etten 31 December 18761

Waarde Theo,

Van harte alles goeds in het nieuwe jaar U toegewenscht, heb het goed en heb zegen in alle opzichten. Heerlijk wij elkaar weer gezien hebben, wat was het mooi dien morgen toen Gij zijt weggegaan en wat zullen wij nog dikwijls aan de reis naar Chaam2 denken.

Moe heeft weer zooveel pijn aan het oog en heeft een doek om, Pa heeft weer zoo heel mooi gepreekt van morgen.

En nu van avond weer Oudejaarsavond, waart Gij ook maar hier.

Er is nog iets nu dat ik U moet vertellen; een paar dagen geleden kwam de Hr. Braat uit Dordt3 een bezoek brengen bij Oom Vincent en zij spraken over mij en oom vroeg aan de Hr B., of er bij hem, indien ik dit verlangde, voor mij plaats zou zijn. De Hr B. dacht hij wel plaats zou hebben en zeide dat ik maar eens moest komen om er over te spreken. Dus ben ik gisteren morgen vroeg er heen geweest, Pa en Moe en ik ook, vonden het iets dat wij niet moesten laten voorbijgaan zonder te zien wat het was.

Sprak met hem af ik na Nieuwejaar eene week bij hem zou komen en na verloop van dien tijd kunnen wij zien.4

Er zijn veel dingen die het wenschelijk maken, het weer terug zijn in Holland in de buurt van Pa en Moe en ook van U en de anderen vooreerst.5 Dan zou het salaris daar zeker iets beter zijn dan bij Mr Jones en vooral met het oog op later wanneer een mensch meer noodig krijgt 1v:2 is het plicht daaraan te denken.

Wat nu het andere betreft, dat laat ik daarom niet varen. Pa’s geest is zoo groot en zoo veelzijdig uitgebreid en onder alle omstandigheden hoop ik zich iets daarvan in mij zal ontwikkelen. de verandering nu zal zijn dat ik in plaats van les te geven aan die jongens in een boekwinkel werkzaam ben.─

Wat hebben wij dikwijls verlangd bij elkaar te zijn en hoe vreesselijk is het gevoel van ver van elkaar te zijn bij ziekte of zorg gelijk wij het bij voorbeeld voelden bij Uwe ziekte, en dan het gevoel dat het gebrek aan het noodige geld zeer goed een beletsel zou kunnen zijn om in nood bij elkaar te zijn.

Dus is het best mogelijk ik daar heen ga.─

Gisteren avond was ik nog bij Oom Vincent om hem te vertellen ik dadelijk naar Dordt was geweest, het was een stormachtigen avond, gij kunt U denken hoe mooi die weg naar Prinsenhage was met de donkere wolken met hun zilveren randen. Ik ging ook nog even in de Roomsche kerk waar avonddienst was, het was een mooi gezicht, al die boeren en de boerinnen met hun zwarte kleeren en witte mutsen, en de kerk zag er zoo vriendelijk uit bij het avondlicht. Gij moet het maar dadelijk aan den Hr. Tersteeg ook zeggen ik 8 dagen daarheen ga om daarna verder te zien, laat ZEd. dezen brief lezen als gij wilt en wensch vooral Hem en Mevrouw veel goeds toe voor mij in het nieuwe jaar. Schrijf U zeer in haast, Anna en de meisjes6 en Cor gingen naar Prinsenhage en Pa wilde ik maar met hen zou medegaan. Tante7 kwam met hen in het rijtuig terug en ik wandelde met Willem Carbentus.─8 Nu jongen, beste broer, wat waren het goede dagen toen wij allen zamen waren,9 heb een goeden oudejaarsavond en geloof mij

Uw liefh. broer

Vincent

Spoedig wel meer ─ à Dieu. Mocht gij schrijven adresseer dan Uw brief naar Dordt.10

translation

1r:1

Etten, 31 December 18761

My dear Theo,

I sincerely wish you the best in the new year, I wish you well and may you be blessed in all things. Wonderful to have seen each other again, how beautiful it was that morning you left, and how often we’ll think back on that trip to Chaam.2

Ma’s eye is hurting a lot again, she has a bandage on; Pa delivered such a beautiful sermon again this morning.

And now this evening New Year’s Eve again, if only you were here.

Now then, there’s something I must tell you: a couple of days ago Mr Braat of Dordrecht3 paid a visit to Uncle Vincent and they spoke about me, and Uncle asked Mr B. whether he would have a place for me, if I should wish it. Mr B. thought he might have a place, and said that I should come sometime to talk about it. So I went there early yesterday morning; Pa and Ma and I, too, thought it was something we shouldn’t let pass without seeing what it was.

Agreed that after the New Year I should go to him for a week, after that we’ll see.4

There are many things that make it desirable, first and foremost my being back in Holland near Pa and Ma, and also you and the others.5 Moreover, the salary would certainly be a little better than with Mr Jones, and especially with an eye to later, when a man has need of more, 1v:2 one is obliged to think of such things.

As far as the other thing is concerned, for these reasons I won’t give it up. Pa’s spirit is so great and many-sided, and at all events I hope that something of it will develop in me. The change means that now, instead of teaching those boys, I’ll be working in a bookshop.

How often we’ve longed to be together, and how terrible it is to feel so far away from one another in cases of illness or anxiety, as we felt, for example, during your illness, and then the feeling that lack of money may very well stand in the way of our being together in times of need.

It’s quite possible, then, that I’ll go there.

Yesterday evening I was at Uncle Vincent’s to tell him that I’d just been to Dordrecht, it was a stormy evening, you can imagine how beautiful the road to Princenhage was with the dark clouds with their silver linings. I also went briefly to the Roman Catholic church, where evening Mass was under way, it was a beautiful sight, all those peasants and their wives with their black clothes and white caps, and the church looked so friendly in the evening light. You must also tell Mr Tersteeg straightaway that I’ll be going there for a week to see how it goes, let His Hon. read this letter, if you will, and be sure to give him and his wife my best wishes for a happy New Year. I’m writing in great haste, Anna and the girls6 and Cor went to Princenhage, and Pa wanted me to go with them. Aunt7 came back with them in the carriage and I went for a walk with Willem Carbentus.8 Now, old boy, dear brother, what good days those were when we were all together,9 have a good New Year’s Eve and believe me

Your loving brother

Vincent

More soon – adieu. If you write, send your letter to Dordrecht.10

notes

1. Like Theo, Vincent had spent the Christmas holidays at home in Etten.

2. Presumably Vincent and Theo travelled to Chaam, a village c. 17 km south-east of Etten, to attend a service conducted by their father, who regularly substituted for the minister there. The trip was recollected again in letter 414.

3. Pieter Kornelis Braat, manager of the bookshop Blussé & Van Braam in Dordrecht. Frans Braat had written to his father, urging him to give Vincent a job. Dirk Braat, another son of P.K. Braat, recollected that there was actually no vacancy, but ‘father did not want to refuse Frans’. See Verzamelde brieven 1973, vol. 1, pp. 108-110 (quotation on p. 108).

4. There were plans to discuss Vincent’s future when he was home at the end of the year. Mr van Gogh wrote on 6 December 1876 to Theo: ‘I long so much to speak with Vincent when he comes at Christmas, to see what will become of him. I sometimes fear that the Rev. Jones exploits him a little as an errand boy and cannot believe that his present path will lead to a proper livelihood’ (FR b2800). Mrs van Gogh also wrote to Theo of the need for a change: ‘He himself did not see much light in his future, but imagined he had to persevere because he thought he must – though I see no grounds for that ‘must’ without study, but it’s good he’s coming and we can talk about it again properly’ (FR b2803, 18 December 1876).

Theo, for his part, got involved in the matter and told his parents of a vacancy, upon which Mr van Gogh wrote to him: ‘I responded immediately to the advertisement you mentioned – but no answer. It is intended for someone who is at least 24 years old’ (FR b2802, 18 December 1876).

Even though Braat conferred with Uncle Vincent, and both Vincent and Theo were acquainted with his son Frans, Mrs van Gogh maintained that the position had materialized without intercession or mediation: ‘You can understand that we positively recognize it as a ray of light from above and the answer to our prayers. By no means did we or anyone else, Uncle Cent included, have a hand in it – it is through meeting Vincent and having faith in him, so to speak, that it was offered to him. He himself sees no prospects in what has gone before and in his own wishes, so why look for something else abroad and not take this wonderful opportunity near us and you?’ (FR b2804, to Theo, 18 December 1876).

5. On the same day as Vincent wrote this letter – 31 December – Mr van Gogh wrote to Theo: ‘An opportunity seems to be opening up for Vincent. He will have written to you about it. It’s like a ray of hope, the more so at the end of the year. I should so much like to have him closer, also to you. From Dordrecht to here it costs only 1.70 guilders return. He could be with us now and then on Sundays. Let us hope. It seems to us his eyes are clearer’ (FR b2804).

6. His other sisters, Willemien and Elisabeth.

7. Aunt Cornelie, Uncle Vincent’s wife.

8. Van Gogh’s cousin Willem Carbentus, the son of Uncle Arie Carbentus and Aunt Fie van Bemmel.

9. Possibly an allusion to Clemens Brentano’s ‘Der Spinnerin Nachtlied’, see letter 18, n. 1.

10. This could mean either that Theo already knew Vincent’s new address in Dordrecht or that he could send his letters in care of the bookshop Blussé & Van Braam.